Author: Chidinma S. Onuoha
Category: Religion and Beliefs
Language: English
Price: ₦ 400
No. of Words: 25739
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  • Leadership
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  • Beliefs

ABIGAIL IS NOT A BITCH - Leadership Lessons from the Wife of a Fool
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  • sarazu MY REVIEW ON ABIGAIL IS NOT A BITCH (leadership lessons from the wife of a fool) by Christmas S. Onuoha Word Count: 25.7k Genre: Christian Literature Abigail, a Woman married to a rich fool set out on a mission to assuage the fury of a powerful fugitive who was insulted by her ‘foolish’ husband. This is my first time reading a book by this author and I must say I am impressed by her style of writing and of course the title. The title 'Abigail is not a bitch' is what I will call a great "buy me" bait. It is in fact what prompted me to read the book. I must confess before reading the book, I never imagined that it was a going to be a Christian literature because what would the words 'bitch' and 'fool' be doing in the title of a Christian literature? Using a biblical story as case study, the author educates women that submission does not mean subservient and humility does not mean weakness or docility. She also addressed the issue of Christian leaders seemingly focused on teaching about the need for women to be submissive to their husband rather than empowering and equipping the women with the tools to manage their household, especially households of women married to ‘fools; even though men were admonished to treat women as the weaker vessels, it was not God's intention that women become weak or docile. She further mentioned that this is the reason a lot of Christian women (sometimes even wives of church leaders) are suffering silently, they are emotionally and physically abused, covering their bruises with a fake smile and good makeup. I agree one hundred percent with her here because this is mostly the case in our society and even in the church. Another thing to note about this book is that Chidinma S. Onuoha although urging women to act instead of being docile, she was not gender biased in this book, she admonished women to take a cue from Abigail and not go overboard and become arrogant but treat their husbands with respect while being tactful and diplomatic in handling situations in the home; "even though Nabal was a fool and his foolish act has placed their entire household in jeopardy, Abigail was still careful to give him respect." One of the reason why I love this book is that the author beautifully used Abigail's story to teach life and leadership lessons. She also highlighted quotes from great leaders. My Final Thoughts: I learnt some lessons from this book, although it got a little boring for me along the way mainly because the author was a bit repetitive, this is most definitely a good read. If you are keen on Christian literature or you are looking for a book that quickens your mind and equips you with tools to handle various life challenges whether in your marriage, at work or any other interpersonal relationships, then this is a book for you. I encourage everyone both male and female especially Christian leaders to buy this book. If you are looking for where to purchase this book, you can find it on Okadabooks.

    Reply Jan 13, 2019 3:51:38 PM
  • Udeme_ Abigail is put in precarious position by Nabal her husband and David- the warrior, what actions does she take and do these actions make her a BITCH? This book was written by Chidinma S, Onuoha and is based on a bible story. It was kind of shocking for me in a good way after reading the first few pages to find out that this was a Christian book because it made me curious, I didn’t initially realize that Abigail was the one from the bible and like the author wrote the word BITCH is not the type of word you find in Christian books. I like that she addressed the popular issue of patriarchy in religion, a lot of people use religion and the whole “wives be submissive to your husbands” quote from the bible to oppress women and I say people above because not only men but women do it to other women too. I like that Chidinma made it clear that every woman’s situation wouldn’t be the same and that the term “fool” is relative even though it was used literally in this book. She gave principles that could be applied no matter the situation. It was amazing how each principle could be used in both personal and professional situations. My personal favorites were how to apply “discretion” and “humility in leadership” all under the last chapter titled diplomatic. My only reservation about this book is not that the issue the author wrote on wasn’t well addressed but because it could have been done in less than 333 pages, it was very repetitive and that made the book a bore read, I struggled to finish this book because I scrolled to a page and I thought I had mistakenly gone back to a previous chapter, I understand the need for emphasis but it made it seem like she was moving in circles instead of going straight to the point. The arrangement of the chapters was so confusing I felt like I read more than one chapter in a chapter because of the numerous subheadings. Some of my favorite quotes from the book were; “Docility is not a biblical strategy; todays women should always think intelligently about how they can overcome the challenges of their personal or professional lives and act diligently” “She understood the biblical expressions about fools and knew that Nabal would not be a different fool” “I am speaking to those Bible-believing women whose situations don’t match the pictures God created for them in His word” I would recommend this book to bible believing women who feel like God/the bible isn’t on their side because of how their pastors, relatives, friends have interpreted the bible to them when they needed advice and comfort and women who want to walk in the light of the scriptures. This is also for women who are married to or dating “fools”, women who are abused whether physically or mentally. This is a book that lifts the spirits and gives women a way to be free.

    Reply Jan 11, 2019 3:07:37 PM
  • Yimikedilo REVIEW: ABIGAIL IS NOT A BITCH- LEADERSHIP LESSONS FROM THE WIFE OF A FOOL BY CHIDINMA S. ONUOHA I must say it was quite the read especially with the catchy book title, I never imagined it a Christian book until I flipped the pages and the writer couldn’t have picked a suitable title for this book. A bitch, the very stereotype men are familiar with and throw around to demean any woman who dares to stand up for herself,or used in a derogatory way by men who feel threatened by women, no matter how people may use it as an endearment, the word Bitch remains a derogatory term. It is a book that seeks to give women the push they need to face life challenges courageously using the tools at their disposal to make changes that not only affect them but to the benefit of everyone around them. The main focus of the book is Abigail the wife of Nabal who the writer uses to spur life changing questios about women in marriage and the challenges they face day in and day out with as much as sitting through domestic violence with the aim of being godly women with the believe that praying is all that is needed for the salvation of the souls of their abusers (husbands). The Book shows us how patriarchy is the major trigger of domestic violence because it is a system that preaches male superiority over women. According to the writer the book aims at lending support to Christian ministers and resource persons by presenting a different and hopefully a refreshing interpretation of the Biblical narrative of Abigail, Nabal and David. It examines how Abigail a beautiful wise woman married to a fool was able to defuse a deadly situation involving four hundred armed warriors. The book gave us some of the skills/attributes Abigail had that she put to effective use to quench a burning fire. Abigail is a strategic thinker because with being married to a fool (Nabal) failure was not option. Abigail used fear to her advantage, she let it keep her alert and active, she used fear to think intelligently about survival nor did she implore the mediocre attitude of well its my husband who has put us in this mess so it’s his responsibility to get us out or since its just the men in my family David is coming to kill, then it is not my business. Abigail had a sense of responsibility also, I must do what I can to ensure we do not go down with the foolish mistakes of my husnand. Abigail was generous, she was daring, tactful, timeful, diligent, courageous, diplomatic and humble. The book gives you practical biblical examples on how to utilize your God given resources to win people over even when you’ve hurt them intentionally or unintentionally. It is also a powerful narrative that can teach todays women how to navigate the murky waters of personal, marital or marketplace politics. Women should study the scriptures to know and understand whether there are specific lessons that they can apply to their siyuation as most Biblical women may not have had the opportunities that todays women have but yet they were intelligent in addressing their challenges like Abigail. Fear holds you back in the comfort zone rather than go out and face your challenges like Abigail did, you must realize that everything that will happen to you for the rest of your life is going to be up to you. Don’t sit and hope because Hope is not a strategy, to get results you need to perform good actions. While the book shows us the necessity of generosity as seen in the case of Abigail and Jacob, two strong biblical characters, but in the absence of supplies what will you presume Abigail and Jacob will have used as a form of generosity? The book should have implored other Biblical options of generosity because both Abigail and Jacob were wealthy? The use of generosity here might come off to some as encouraging bribery as a form of appeasement. While generosity might not be a bad idea, I have seen instances where the aggrieved party just wants an apology (sorry) and nothing more. I also feel that one’s generosity here could be exploited depending on who is involved. The book had a lot of repetitions’ where the writer writes and quotes simultaneously and goes ahead to repeat same text, quoted and unquoted in subsequent pages which I felt was unnecessary. Some of the points also could have been merged seeing as they are interrelated. I found myself saying out loud, what will I do if I wasn’t afraid and for that I know that everyone who reads this book will do same. Kudos!!!

    Reply Jan 10, 2019 10:57:32 AM
  • Bafunto The book - Abigail is not a Bitch - reveals a truth that has been hidden or better put, under recognized for so many years. Society has in its quest of fighting feminism pit religion, which is widely accepted by many, against the philosophy. As such, most feminists have tried to distance themselves away from religion while a few of them are trying to adjust the religion that has been given unto them to accommodate the principles of feminism. However, the book shows that there is no need for merging of any kind, as women have truly been great even in the Bible, a holy book that has been used as a tool for submerging the female folks for years. The book explores the Biblical story of how Abigail, a wise wife of a rich fool prevented a crisis that could have wiped out all the men in her family. This she did without bruising the ego of either her foolish husband or the angry warrior who was ready to massacre her household. The story reveals that even in a patriarchal society which is dominant in the world, and even while also practicing a religion in which women have been advised by the Holy Book to “submit to their husbands”, a woman still has the heavenly permission to be brave and go against her husband’s decision if the situation warrants it. The book explains the clear differences between wifely submission and docility and clearly reveals how the words of the Bible have been used to oppress godly women. The mannerism with which the author analyzed the narrative and supported her stances with excerpts from books written by accomplished individuals is very excellent. However, the book can still be improved if it can accommodate more than the story of Abigail. That way, a woman, after reading through, will be convinced that Abigail was not just an accident, and that any woman, in any part of the world can be godly, diligent, rise to the peak of her career and exert her true self whether or not she has a man, whether or not her man is a fool like Nabal. This book should be read by every man who thinks he can use religion to oppress the women in his life, and be read by every woman who thinks God wants for her to be weak and docile, and also by every feminist who thinks he/she has to move away from religion to practice his/her gender philosophy.

    Reply Jan 9, 2019 6:04:14 PM
  • Aigbine Like the author said in the first few pages of the book, I did wonder what the name Abigail and the word Bitch were doing in the same sentence. I didn’t even think it was the Bible’s Abigail till I opened the first page. In a haste to quench this curiosity, I quickly went through the book. It is truly an interesting one that gave me insight I never had to the story of Abigail. What is most often overlooked and rarely talked about even in church. I don’t think I’ve heard it preached but trust me, right now I can deliver a sermon based on Abigail. While at our time, we may not face the exact hurdles that Abigail faced, we can learn a thing or two. Integrative thinking and the theory of constraints stand out to me. I will not go further into this so that I do not spoil the book for you. From just how many verses in the Bible(the story of Abigail) the author was able to bring out so much, even going as far as comparing it to business situation (I was as surprised as you). How the actions of Abigail, a woman married to a man regarded as foolish changed the course of fate for her household. the wisdom, skills and courage it took for her to take charge of the situation and at such a time when patriarchy was at an all time high. The author repeats these verses quite a number of timed (for good reason) and even plays out other ways the story could have gone. Abigail could have allowed her husband's wrong decision change the course of her life for the worse of course, but instead she went against the norm, and is regarded a wise woman as such. I do hope that others who read it find it inspiring and are able to learn a thing or two. These strategies and lessons can be applied at home, work or whenever making a decision is necessary. You may not have Nabal for a husband but you may have one other constraint(I learnt this from the book), learn how to analyze a situation quickly and effectively just as Abigail did. Also the references to other books on leadership were quite refreshing and I’ll be checking some of them out. Normally I’m not one to read a motivational book or the sorts, fiction is definitely my forté but right now I’m ready to try them all. I just hope I don’t lose interest. My females friends are definitely going to be reading this. My male friends also, nobody should be like Nabal who was so full of himself that he failed to see the danger he had put his household. An educating read. I look forward to more from this author.

    Reply Jan 9, 2019 11:26:38 AM